halloween costumes i’d like to see and not see this halloween

Costumes I’d Like to See on Halloween

WOLF BLITZER
Classic. Can’t find salt-and-pepper whiskers or moth-ball odorous suit? I’ll also accept wolves Teen, Big Bad, and Steppen.

COMPETITIVE OYSTER EATER
Oysters are aphrodisiacs.

PASTRAMI ON RYE
Not because it’s a good costume. I just like pastrami on rye.

Costumes I’d Like to Not See on Halloween

SLUTTY COMPETITIVE OYSTER EATER
I don’t care that oysters are aphrodisiacs. I don’t care!
[NO IMAGE!]

SLUTTY BABY
No. No! No one wants to see a saucy infant. No one! Save it for TLC’s “Toddlers and Tiaras” (and then definitely DVR that trainwreck).
[NO IMAGE!]

SLUTTY PASTRAMI ON RYE
Actually, that could be quite interesting.

Costumes I’d Like to Nazi* on Halloween
*where Nazi is the verb meaning “to exert brute force and authoritarian dictatorship on, particularly in a racist capacity”

SS OFFICER
Self-explanatory.

3 Comments

  • Jake
    Posted October 21, 2010 at 3:11 pm

    I remember when I was 6 or 7 and my mom would dress me up like a slutty competitive oyster eater, and bring me house to house trick-or-treating and showing off my costume! Childhood halloween was so much fun!

  • Brooklyn
    Posted October 22, 2010 at 5:34 am

    What about a slutty Wolf Blitzer?! I now know what I’m dressing up for this Halloween…

  • Reen
    Posted October 27, 2010 at 3:37 pm

    Thanks for my next halloween costume idea – the Steppenwolf!

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