Click image to view larger
This entry was posted on Saturday, March 29th, 2008 at 12:28 pm and is filed under Doodles.
You can leave a comment
impressive cross hatching! sadly, it generally reminds me of an alcoholic math teacher i had. he always said the guess and check method applied purely to marriage… if that gives you any kind of idea.
Either a) that’s a massive, floor-to-ceiling blackboard, or b) he teaches from the dark, dark abyss of his soul. I gotta go with b.
He’s a pretty sharp dresser, senile or not.
Does having a dream that you are awesome actually make you awesome? An example would be that the kids at school sodomized you with pinecones for being such a faggy fag fag. This is not good for your self esteem. You feel both pain from the pinecones being shoved up your ass causing massive intestinal damage and something called mental pain. Mental pain is a new theory recently discussed on progressive daytime talkshows. Mental pain can be as painful as physical pain and in some cases hurt even more. Let’s stick with the sodomy theme and say that you are a big shot investment broker in the big apple. Well one of your fellow co-workers thinks your getting a little to big for your britches because you walk around like a big shot investment broker in the big apple. This results in your co-worker shoving a big apple up your ass while he insults you for being a big shot. While it may physically hurt to have a big apple shoved up your ass, 9 out of 10 times it is the insults that hurt more. This is why mental pain is an issue that needs to be taken much more seriously then sodomy. From personal experience I have found that it takes no less then 10 large pinecones shoved up my ass to equal the pain inflicted by just one insult. Doctors and multiple surgeries can heal the wounds inflicted by pincones in my intestines but insults like, “big shot”, “Mr. High and Mighty”, and “Jew Face” will devestate my self esteem and change how I look at myself. This brings me all the way back to the question I asked you 14 sentences ago. Does having a dream that you are awesome actually make you awesome? The answer you have been waiting for is, yes. Let’s say after a hard day of being sodomized at the office by everyone from your boss to the copy boys, you don’t feel up for a hot night on the town with your boyz. You feel that mental pain we talked about earlier. So you decide to schlub on the couch with a giant box of fruit rollups you bought from costco and proceed to eat 48 oz. of fruity goodness while you watch Gilmore Girls and cry. At this point you don’t feel to good about yourself so you take some sleeping pills and dream your little dreams. As you enter dream world you forget about all your troubles like being sodomized and Rory getting her period in the middle of class at Yale. All of a sudden you are in a world where pinecones are only used by humans to make festive birdfeeders and hateful words like Mr. Bigshot and jew face are not in anyones vocabulary. Gilmore girls is on NBC primetime Tuesdays at 9:00 PM which is the best slot and Rory never even gets periods. You are now thinking, “Am I in heaven?”. No, you are just dreaming, something every man, woman, and child can do everyday or night. Again back to my initial question, does having a dream that you are awesome actually make you awesome? When you wake up from heaven, I mean your dream, you will go from feeling like the million dollar man to feeling like the million dollars worth of pinecones up my ass boy. It will be a real shock. But who says you have to feel that way. You don’t. If you dream about your shit not stinking, then walk around in life knowing that your shit does not stink. Who is to say dreams aren’t real? For all you know dreams are real life and what we percieve to be our real life is just a continuing dream. Did you ever even think of that? Well I just thought of it for you. You can thank me later. So tonight when you have a dream about me raping you with pinecones just remember, it is not a dream. It is as real as real gets. Wink.
Wow. Charles’ response is quite wordy. And interesting.
um… is there no longer an rss feed for this blog? cause the feed i was subscribed to pre-redesign is no longer feeding and i don’t see a link for a new one.
seriously, these doodles were up for, like, a DAY before i saw them. not acceptable.
As ever, a thoroughly satisfying batch of doodles. Delicious!
I want him at my next birthday party.
He’s cute but needs to do more crossword puzzles. A puzzle a day keeps the Ahlzheimers away.
[…] The art of Michael Showalter […]
Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *
You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>
<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>