London Fog

I’m in London right now. I’m in the lobby of The Jury’s Inn Hotel on Something’ton Road. I’m waiting for cab to take me back to Heathrow. I’ve been here for just shy of a week on some family business. It was a lovely trip and I’m happy to be headed back to the states. I like how in such a short time you can get a read on a city. Here’s what’s shaking in London these last few days.

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1) The town is all a-buzz over the thwarted terrorist plot to bomb 10 airplanes and commit mass murder of an “unimaginable scale.” That’s one little thing that’s going on here.

2) Nikki, Lea, Mikey, and Grace were voted off of “Big Brother” but were then voted back on. Sort of. Well, okay, they were voted into a house next door to the “Big Brother” house and one of them will be voted back into the house. Mikey and Grace are hooking up. Mikey was also hooking up with Imogen when he was in the house. Now Imogen is one of the two housemates facing eviction (along with Ricky.) Everyone’s pissed because it cost money to vote the housemates off and now they’re bringing them back on the show. WTF!

3) David Beckham won’t be on the national team anymore. They’ve brought in a new head coach – Mclarren – and he’s making SWEEPING changes. Priority number one, Beckham is yesterday’s news.

4) The Royal phones are being tapped by a London tabloid. Members of Prince Charles’ inner-circle are having their conversation illegally surveilled by the press. It’s fucked up and everyone is pissed as hell about it.

5) A major crime involving a young boy who immigrated to London from Nigeria and who was fatally stabbed by two youths in a Peckham slum has come to a bittersweet end. The two youths, brothers last-named Preddie, who were 12 and 13 at the time of the crime, now 18 and 19, were convicted of manslaughter. This ends six grueling years of emotional trials.

6) Sir Paul McCartney locked Heather Mills out of their house and it embarassed her. It seems like their divorce won’t be amicable.

7) Brits loved food that is “potted.”

8) Starbucks has fully invaded London and I was a prime benefactor.

9) All the pubs have names that follow a formula which is gross word+noun Examples: The Slimy Badger, The Grody Onion, The Scabby Pirate.

God Bless the Queen!

18 comments

  1. Not to sound all maternal on you, but I really hope you stay safe and everything is okay over there.

    Try some bangers and mash, drink some pale ale.

    I hope you’re okay.

  2. everyone knows the best english food is indian food.

  3. agreed.

  4. Oh Sho…how could you leave out that Kate Moss and Pete Doherty got back together?!

  5. No silly walking while you’re there you hear? How will you ever meet that bloody Twiggy with all that silly walking?

  6. Indian food…mmm. Chicken Tikki with naan? or Tandoori Chicken on the bone with guby (it’s yellow, potatoes and what not…).

  7. So true, in Stratford there’s a popular pub called the Dirty Duck

  8. “The town is all a-buzz over the thwarted terrorist plot to bomb 10 airplanes and commit mass murder of an “unimaginable scale.” That’s one little thing that’s going on here.”

    I think people are starting to figure out that its not only Americans the terrorists are after. We’re not the only bullies they dont like.

    David Beckham is such old news especially after cheating on his wife.

    (Starbucks)
    did you notice if you drink inside its one price, and if you drink elsewhere its cheaper? they do that tax for in or out food/beverages. I went into one place bought a sandwhich but didnt eat it, and waited for a friend to finish hers. the cashier nearly took my head off even though the sandwhich was still in its package.

  9. God save the Queens and the straight people as well! Was London bloody brilliant or whot, mate?

  10. sho, i sho hoped you shaved because they could’ve mistaken you for an american werewolf in london!

  11. You’ve made me wish there actually was a pub called “The Grody Onion”.
    I don’t think you got a fair view of England from just visiting London. We have much nicer places (and Pub names) in the rural hinterland.

    I’m actually embarassed that you had to watch Big brother. This year’s housemates have been scrapped not from the bottom of the barrel, but from the weird black gungey stuff that accumulates in the woodgrain when the barrel has been standing around in a damp cellar for too long.

  12. I’d have to agree with your comments on London pubs. I was in the city for three weeks this past June and my favorite pub was Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese.

  13. Fun fact: there was a tiny photo of you on the cover of the Metro (the free daily paper thing) today.

  14. Oh, Heather Mills McCartney. You don’t know what you had.

  15. half a leg and a Beatle?

  16. I think I ate at The Scabby Pirate on Easter Holiday… I had bangers and mash. and a jug of ale. I love England. And your blog, Very good reads. :)

  17. Love is the beacon that guides a solitary heart out of the fog of loneliness.

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