Tour Day One – July 16th. (by the way, this happened last Monday)
Sorry it’s taken me so long. Internet is sparse up here! Ugh. I will keep the updates coming though. We started in Denver. Now we’re in San Francisco. We were in Portland, Anchorage, Seattle, Eugene, Boise, Salt Lake City, so much to say, so little time…but here’s how it all started last week. Flew out of JFK. Took a car with Zak and Eugene to the airport.
Nothing too eventful. I bought a pack of Trident bubblegum and a Sports Illustrated (with the Mets on the cover.) Go Mets! The Amazin’s are good this year. Gotta love the kid (David Wright.) I remember a few summers ago marvelling at the disaster that was – Mo Vaughn, Robby Alomar, Jeromy Buritz. I mean who fuckin’ spells Jeromy like that? We had a snack in the terminal. I would tell you that I ate fruit but I didn’t. I had a meatball parm at noon. Fuck you. I don’t care. That’s what I ate. Zak has given me permission to report that he had a hamburger. Eugene has given me permission to report that he had pot stickers with hot and sour soup. Leo met us at the airport and he has given me permission to report that he had salmon and tofu. Leo has also requested that I call him by his new nickname, “Roach Motel” which is derived from a nickname I bequested upon him earlier, that being, “Leo Durocher”, the Hall of Fame Baseball manager.
Leo has nicknamed me “Old Man River” which is derived from “Show Boat” which is of course derived from “Showalter.” Anyhow, the flight went off without much fanfare. We touched down in Denver and wondered what kind of food Denver was known for and someone suggested “Denver Omelette.” This made sense. We drove right to the venue – The Blue Bird Theater.
I was overjoyed to see my name in lights above the marquee. I’ve always dreamed of sharing a bill with The Buzzcocks. What’s next? Echo And The Bunnymen? Aztec Camera? LL Cool J was playing a show too, down the street. We doubted highly that there was a conflict of interest there audience-wise. Not the same demo. We ate dinner at Wolfe’s, Denver’s best BBQ joint.
The food was great. BBQ is the official food of The Comedy Men From Tomorrow. When four dudes travel together everything becomes fodder for jokes about penis or taking a crap. For instance, if someone says “Did anyone bring a hard drive?” The answer will be something like, “Yeah, I have a hard drive in my pants.” After the show we had a late night meal at Denver’s best all-night diner: Pete’s Kitchen. I had a cheeseburger. This brought my one day meat intake total to exactly one half of an entire cow.
By the time we drove out of town we were a long gone memory.
That’s show biz baby!